dc atlantis

Duckpin bowling was first developed in Maryland, which is generally considered a flag – might be red; waved in semaphore; perhaps hung limp like a truce.  Other things invented in Maryland include the beerneck.  And nothing else.  Either way, arriving at a duckpin bowling alley perfectly captures the emerging cognition that someone fucked up and wants you to obscure their mistake with stilted conversation and lite beer.

Romantic as stoned, white-Russian-drinking Lebowski’s might have it in their heads, yeah it’s painful to admit it, but bowling is less an activity and more an acquiescence to someone’s bad planning.  Bowling generally has little gravity for the casual passerby; people don’t walk past an alley and decide, “fuck it, why not go bowling?”

Regardless, I love bowling, and if no one else is willing to claim exception, here I am.  I enjoy a game that hardly penalizes high BAC.  I digress – the vitriol here is reserved for duckpin bowling,

A youth enjoys inebriation and casual parenting.

which has about as much merit in terms of sport as hurling a croquet ball at a fence post.  Some might deign to harsh the mellow of  Candlepin bowling, but this is as an interesting take on traditional bowling and satisfies most of the skill set associated with 10-pin bowling albeit with Canada’s Spartan flair.

Duckpin bowling begins and ends with disappointment.  Fun is elusive at the start, and 12 drinks into fun-finding nets about as much delight as the wincing recovery from stomach flu.  Someone might leave something fun on the ground, but it’s your job to scrape that crap up and enjoy it.  Maybe I’m not trying hard enough.