dc atlantis

I just posted more junk on Craigslist with some anticipation cut with anxiety.  I meet weird people through the online bulletin board.  When I first moved back to the States I ended up living with some nutter, Mark, of Annapolis, MD.  Mark survived inspired 3 divorces and decorated the downstairs of his home with the wreckage.  Mark is an alcoholic.  Mark owns several beer cozies.  I thought beer cozies were a joke – who actually has a fit about a cold beer bottle?

Souless, empty, and alone. Like Mark.

Each time Mark returned from bars early in the AM, I would wake to the sound of beer cans spilling out of the truck cab.  Now, this is not an exaggeration.  Not a fuckton, not an assload, maybe just a shitpound of beer cans, but they would fall out of the truck cab when he opened the driver side door.  Next he would stagger towards the house clutching a beer (in a cozy- as an aside, I think Mark could benefit from a beerneck), slamming the front door, followed by a frozen food disastering in the kitchen, and screaming at me about having my windows open, or whatever else was on his mind. In sum, a performance driven encapsulation of the sentiment, “Fuck my life.”

Not a beer cozy.

Craigslist also introduced me to some pretty outlandish scams driven by opportunists with a feeble grasp of “opportunity” in common parlance.  I have put items up for sale – an IKEA chair say – and heard back from individuals who really want that chair – really want that chair – but are deaf, dumb, blind, and living several States distant.  I believe a scam is best when it’s at least plausible.  Tailoring an email for a check-scam or escrow-scam is believable for something over 200 dollars.  But a 5 dollar chair?

Today I expect great things.  Don’t disappoint me Craig, get me on that list and get with the strange.